Age Difference and What It Means In A Relationship
When you're young, one of the things you think about is the kind of person you'd like to be with and for a lot of people the idea of being with someone older and more mature has crossed your mind. It's okay to admit it. No shame. But once you become an adult, hopefully you realize that it's not an okay thing to be a part of.
What a lot of teenagers don't realize is that when you date someone who's considerably and noticeably older than you, is that there's a clear power play going on. Whether intentional or not it's there and it's not healthy. If you're a freshman and you're dating a senior it's not going to be a healthy relationship.
You may not notice it but a few years makes a world of difference in terms of life experience, wisdom, and thought process. What you know now and the opinions you have will be wildly different in a few years and you'll look back on your younger self with nostalgia but also a sense of relief at how you've grown. Now ask yourself. Knowing what you know now, would you want to date yourself from a couple years back? If the answer is no, congrats you're a decent person with common sense.
The problem with some people is that they see someone who's younger than them by a considerable amount and think, "Yeah, that's a good candidate for a partner." Not even thinking about how that's taking advantage and that they're being really weird and a little predatory. Now, I'm not saying it's necessarily on purpose most of the time, but I think if people took a second and thought about it, they wouldn't go through with the pursuit of that relationship.
What bothers me is when I hear teenagers going, "I just want someone more mature. I'm making this decision for myself." No, that's not right. One, if they were actually mature they wouldn't go through with this. They'd be telling you that it's inappropriate and explain why it's better to date someone your own age. Second, you're obviously not old enough to make decisions for yourself. Otherwise you wouldn't want this.
Another thing is, because one person is so much older than the other, there's this idea of, "I know more than you do. Just listen to me." I don't like that. A relationship is supposed to be equal and there's no way that a relationship can be equal if one party is constantly holding their experience and intellect over the other.
Being with an older person can also lead to self esteem issues and mess you up when it comes to the way you view romantic relationships. What you expect out of a partner is forever skewed. You won't know how to properly take charge when need be because you're used to always being lead by an older counterpart.
All in all, it's just better that we find someone who's close in age to us so that we can have meaningful and equal relationships. Also remember that if you have to look up if it's legal it's not worth it.
What a lot of teenagers don't realize is that when you date someone who's considerably and noticeably older than you, is that there's a clear power play going on. Whether intentional or not it's there and it's not healthy. If you're a freshman and you're dating a senior it's not going to be a healthy relationship.
You may not notice it but a few years makes a world of difference in terms of life experience, wisdom, and thought process. What you know now and the opinions you have will be wildly different in a few years and you'll look back on your younger self with nostalgia but also a sense of relief at how you've grown. Now ask yourself. Knowing what you know now, would you want to date yourself from a couple years back? If the answer is no, congrats you're a decent person with common sense.
The problem with some people is that they see someone who's younger than them by a considerable amount and think, "Yeah, that's a good candidate for a partner." Not even thinking about how that's taking advantage and that they're being really weird and a little predatory. Now, I'm not saying it's necessarily on purpose most of the time, but I think if people took a second and thought about it, they wouldn't go through with the pursuit of that relationship.
What bothers me is when I hear teenagers going, "I just want someone more mature. I'm making this decision for myself." No, that's not right. One, if they were actually mature they wouldn't go through with this. They'd be telling you that it's inappropriate and explain why it's better to date someone your own age. Second, you're obviously not old enough to make decisions for yourself. Otherwise you wouldn't want this.
Another thing is, because one person is so much older than the other, there's this idea of, "I know more than you do. Just listen to me." I don't like that. A relationship is supposed to be equal and there's no way that a relationship can be equal if one party is constantly holding their experience and intellect over the other.
Being with an older person can also lead to self esteem issues and mess you up when it comes to the way you view romantic relationships. What you expect out of a partner is forever skewed. You won't know how to properly take charge when need be because you're used to always being lead by an older counterpart.
All in all, it's just better that we find someone who's close in age to us so that we can have meaningful and equal relationships. Also remember that if you have to look up if it's legal it's not worth it.
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