Gross Double Standard
I was scrolling through social media when I happened upon a very troubling post, or a response to a post, regarding age differences and how they are perceived depending on the gender of the older party in the relationship. And not only was I confused in this person's thinking but I was and still am frightened by this way of thinking.
Basically what the person said was that it is "gross" to come down on a woman for dating a man who is substantially younger than her because "if it were a man" it would be perceived as alright. And what I have to say to that is, you my fellow human have your standards mixed up.
Usually the way I see things being handled is: If a man is pursuing a female who is considerably younger than he is, he's called a perv and a creep. If a woman is pursuing a male who is younger than she, the guy is called a God and a champ and given a pat on the back for getting with a cougar. See: When the public gets wind of teacher/student relationships. Men are hung up by their neck and all women have to do is bat their eyes and shed a few tears, talk about how lonely they've been and they get a slap on the wrist. We've seen this before.
My point is, it's disgusting and wrong in both cases. It pushes the unfair assumption that males can't be susceptible to abusive and manipulative relationships when that's far from the truth. It's a reinforcement of the message that men see everyday which is that they aren't allowed to have feelings or possess anything but the pinnacle of masculinity and power.I really wish people would get off this.
My most popular post on this blog is about age difference in relationships. It's a shame that I have to basically reiterate that point and add that women shouldn't practice in this kind of relationship either. My fellow women, do not pursue men who are substantially younger than you. It's not a fair and equal relationship. This also goes for same sex relationships as well just to make the point even clearer.
I don't know where that person got that kind of thinking from but it's dangerous and alarming.
Basically what the person said was that it is "gross" to come down on a woman for dating a man who is substantially younger than her because "if it were a man" it would be perceived as alright. And what I have to say to that is, you my fellow human have your standards mixed up.
Usually the way I see things being handled is: If a man is pursuing a female who is considerably younger than he is, he's called a perv and a creep. If a woman is pursuing a male who is younger than she, the guy is called a God and a champ and given a pat on the back for getting with a cougar. See: When the public gets wind of teacher/student relationships. Men are hung up by their neck and all women have to do is bat their eyes and shed a few tears, talk about how lonely they've been and they get a slap on the wrist. We've seen this before.
My point is, it's disgusting and wrong in both cases. It pushes the unfair assumption that males can't be susceptible to abusive and manipulative relationships when that's far from the truth. It's a reinforcement of the message that men see everyday which is that they aren't allowed to have feelings or possess anything but the pinnacle of masculinity and power.I really wish people would get off this.
My most popular post on this blog is about age difference in relationships. It's a shame that I have to basically reiterate that point and add that women shouldn't practice in this kind of relationship either. My fellow women, do not pursue men who are substantially younger than you. It's not a fair and equal relationship. This also goes for same sex relationships as well just to make the point even clearer.
I don't know where that person got that kind of thinking from but it's dangerous and alarming.
Comments
Post a Comment